Fight With Yourself!
I know…I know…You’ve been thinking about how fighting can be good.
But, hear me out.
Not all fights are bad. Especially the ones with yourself where you don’t let your negative side win.
Let me tell you some stories about my life.
I was in 6th grade, and we were working on a project in art class. I had proudly presented my finished product — an intricate drawing of a rose — to the teacher, expecting nothing but praise.
Instead, she ripped it to shreds.
“This is the most terrible drawing I’ve ever seen,” she said before handing it back to me.
I wanted to curl up under a desk and die.
I came home crying and tearing up my artwork, vowing never to pick up a pencil again.
Fortunately, my mom sat me down and talked some sense into me.
“There are some battles that are worth fighting-and that doesn’t just mean with other people,” she said. “In fact, the most important and difficult fights we’ll ever face will be against ourselves.”
That’s when I realized that she was right. It wasn’t the criticism that hurt me. It was my reaction to it. I had given up on something I loved because someone else didn’t like it.
Plus, I was afraid of failing.
So, I picked myself back up and started drawing again. And you know what? I got better. A lot better.
Now, I’m not saying that every fight is worth picking — sometimes, it’s just not worth the energy. But some battles are worth fighting — especially if they’re with yourself.
I share 4 of those fights with picking with yourself based on my experience.
#1. The Fight to Prevent The Inner Demons Control You
I was in high school, and things were totally different from those in middle school. Everyone seemed much more grown up, and I felt like I was just this little kid trying to keep up.
Academically, I was fine.
But socially, I was a mess.
I didn’t know how to talk to people my age. I felt like an outsider in my grade.
I tried hard to fit in, but it didn’t seem to work. The more I tried, the more left out I felt.
I was so caught up in feeling sorry for myself that I didn’t even realize that things were slowly starting to change.
Every day my parents used to counsel me. They’d convince me to attempt to talk to someone new. I’m glad I listened to them and fought my inner demons.
Though I didn’t make fast friends, I felt comfortable at school.
I also saw the positives in my situation, like how I didn’t have to deal with drama and popularity contests.
It was a fight to face my inhibitions, but it was worth it.
Now, even on the darkest days, I know there’s always a light at the end of the tunnel.
#2. The Fight to Let Your Real Self Breathe Freedom
In my sophomore year, I finally felt like I belonged somewhere. I made some great friends, and I did well in my classes.
But there was one problem: “I didn’t feel like I could be myself around my friends.”
I was afraid they would reject me if they saw the real me.
So instead, I put on a persona that I thought would be more “socially” acceptable.
I was always the life of the party, even when I didn’t feel like it. I laughed at all of their jokes, even when they weren’t funny.
And I went along with whatever they wanted to do, even when I didn’t want to.
It was exhausting.
And eventually, it started to take a toll on my mental health.
During a spiritual retreat at the “Brahmakumaris,” I realized that I couldn’t keep up the act forever and that I needed to start being myself.
It was a scary thought, but I knew it was worth the risk.
So, I started opening up to my friends about the things that mattered to me, and you know what?
They did reject me!
It took me a while to soak that pain.
But, I was befriending myself.
Every day I could breathe a sense of fulfillment.
The fight to be yourself is always worth it because, at the end of the day, you need to be able to look in the mirror and like the person you see.
#3. The Fight to Overcome The Failure Feeling
I’m a pretty determined person, but there are times when I want to give up.
For example, when I started as an online writer, I got frustrated with my work. I compared myself to other writers and felt I could never measure up.
I thought about quitting all the time. Why bother if I was going to be a mediocre writer?
But then I realized I shouldn’t let the fear of failure overpower my passion for writing.
I kept going. I kept writing, even on the days when I felt like it was pointless.
My aim was to enjoy the writing process.
And eventually, my skills improved (I hope so). I got published in places I never thought possible. And I realized that determination is worth the fight.
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Thanks once again!
See ya next time!
Lots of love,
Darshak