Hi Friend,
Sorry to keep you waiting. I couldn’t see you last Wednesday as I had a medical emergency.
Unexpected health issues are the best life lessons. They come uninvited. They teach you. They make you strong, and they go.
Laying on the bed all alone in the hospital gave me chills. It reminded me of my previous visit due to Covid. Though my situation was not that bad, the fear was!
I wasn’t prepared, I guess! So, soon!
That’s the way life is. When you least expect the troubles, they come for you.
I am a workaholic person. Since I had nothing to do in the hospital(no books, no phones, nothing to entertain myself), I started introspecting. About life! Problems! Struggles!
I will share with you those thoughts. I promise I won’t bore you!
Most of us believe that the joy of life lies in discovering the unknown. In contrast, some are lazy like me to anticipate the future.
However, uncertainty is tricky — sometimes, it surprises you with pleasant outcomes while sometimes paralyzes you in shock.
So, I will share the three most important unexpected events of life no one is ever prepared for but should be. To breathe peace. To enjoy life.
1. What’s in store for you
There’re tons of advice articles that talk only about the “success plan.” Not about a failure plan. Since no one ever thinks what they should do if they failed, they often get drowned in the quagmire of negative thinking leading to (unwanted) stress. I was one of them.
Since childhood, everyone taught me (only) to have a plan B in case plan A failed, which I guess most of us do. But, what if plan B or C or D failed too? No one prepared me for those failures. That’s the biggest reason for depression in my life. You might not always succumb to your failures, but an unexpected failure/job loss can ruin your peace of mind and sometimes relationships.
Whenever we set some goals for ourselves, we only look at the brighter side— “If I win, I’ll get a rugged Porsche, or I’ll have a vacation in Bali, etc.” But, what if all the plans fail?
“Better to have a known enemy than a forced ally.” — Napoleon
Do I have an alternative if nothing goes my way? — This question propels you to live purposefully. Anticipating the worst-case scenario empowers you to explore other options and remain stable in times of turmoil.
So, every day, I empower myself, “Failures and successes are a part of life. Not life! Even if I lose my job or fail at blogging, it’s fine; it’s not the end of life.”
2. What do others think of you
Relationships are fragile these days. People change faster than the weather.
Nowadays, you don't even need to do or say something nasty to ruin your relationships with people.
In the quest of acquiring everything fast, we look at one another through the lens of profit and loss.
The “pleasure principle” says our brains are wired to give up easily on things/people we don’t benefit from. The reason is “instant gratification.”
If you’re benefitting from my companionship, our relationship survives. If not, I am an alien.
But, this scenario is changing the fabric of life. We’re becoming more prone to stress and depression due to unexpected breakups, insults, or just unfavorable public opinions.
I learned a lesson hard and clear — an insult is just a perception. Not a reality.
When everyone left me dry when I was hit with long-term unemployment. My relatives even hated me when I rebelled against their idea of settling down in (their kind of) a relationship.
Everything is transient in life. Even your loved ones can leave you without an eviction notice. So, it’s better to befriend yourself and indulge in self-love practices as I did here.
3. What will my last day look-like
Death is the ultimate truth of life we have to face. Anytime, anywhere! It can be now; it can be ten years from now.
But are we prepared to leave this world peacefully?
I once had a nightmare that changed my life. Forever.
I was on the deathbed, fully experiencing the feelings of dying and saying “goodbye.” I saw all the people whom I had met during my lifetime standing beside me. I had to be loud to be heard. But my voice was breaking, and my eyes were hazed with tears.
The sense of loss was irreparable. I saw how much I’d left out of my life.
I was in an emotional mess when I heard a voice in my head, “Are you ready to depart?”I wanted to say, “I wasn’t. I have so many wishes to fulfill. So many apologies to make. So much pain, jealousy, and arrogance to release.”
But it was all in vain.
I woke up sweating like a pig and breathing like a dog.
This experience still haunts me to my core.
Following this event, I made a mantra of my life:
“Live your life with no expectations, so that you can die with zero regrets.”
Every day, I try to live as if it’s my last. It’s tough, but I keep it simple.
Whenever I feel jealous, anxious about someone’s success, agitated by my failures, I remind myself of the day when I will have to face my “heavenly father.” I never thought the idea of death could make my life.
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I hope you enjoyed reading my today’s letter as much I did writing it. If you did, don’t forget to share it with your friends and family.
Please let me know which idea from today’s letter resonated with you the most.
Also, take a moment to think about what your everyday life is like.
Are you missing some great possibilities because you are not prepared enough? Do you repeat the same “errors” because you oppose preparedness?
Before you go, I will leave you with a powerful quote from Benjamin Franklin:
“Failing To Prepare Is Preparing To Fail”
Thanks for reading.
Stay happy, blessed, and safe! See you next Wednesday!
With love,
Darshak
P.S ~ If you missed my last letter, you can find it here.